When?

 A few weeks ago, Christy and I had the opportunity to go to the NewSpring Leadership Conference in Anderson, South Carolina.  It was refreshing and recharging and I could not have asked for a better conference to attend.

The speaker line up was full of some of the best church communicators out there today.  Perry Noble (pastor at New Spring Church – SC), Jud Wilhite (Pastor at Central Christian Church – Las Vegas), Steven Furtick (Pastor at Elevation Church – Charlotte) Mark Driscoll (Pastor at Mars Hill – Seattle), Andy Stanley (Pastor at NorthPoint Church – Atlanta), Judah Smith (Pastor at City Church – Seattle) and Craig Groeschel (Pastor at LifeChurch – Oklahoma).  While they all brought great messages of encouragement and challenge, I think the overall theme came down to one question that Judah Smith asked during his message… “When did Jesus stop being enough?”

While it wasn’t the theme, as I read through my notes on the plane ride home, it seemed to me that every speaker’s message revolved around that idea.

As I started to think about our new series that starts this week called NOT A FAN. I began to think back to that question… “When did Jesus stop being enough?”

When did church become about “everything” instead of just the “one thing?”  When did it become about programs and special events and the idea of “what’s in it for me” instead of being about Jesus, and Him alone?

Sometimes people think if we are not DOING a bunch of everything, then we are failing somehow in ministry.  I want to say that is wrong thinking.  Open up your Bible or open up a new tab on top to Matthew 28:18-20.  I’ll give you a minute.  Alright, read it?

If not, here it is - ¹⁸ Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. ¹⁹ Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” (NIV)

I would like to HIGHLIGHT a few words here… Jesus does not tell us to go and make programs or bigger churches or fans of Him… he calls us to make disciples (fully devoted followers of Him) and teach them about Him and pass on His commands.

While it is great that churches provide all that they do, we really need to be careful to not let those things become priority or the reason why we go to church or do church.  Church is not about us.  We are not there to be entertained.  That is a FAN mentality that cannot be, because Jesus didn’t ask for fans, He has challenged us to be followers and to make them.

Starting this Sunday we will be discussing the difference – I hope you join us this Sunday as we kick this series off.

A letter to our partners

On August 26th, I sent this letter to our "partners" and thought that I would post it here in case I didn't have your mailing address (or if you just wanted to know what was going on)

Dear Paragon partner,

I hope this letter finds you well and walking with the Lord.  I must admit that I am not one who likes informal, impersonal, form letters, but I figured this is the best way to let you know where we are as a church, and where we are going.

When the idea of Paragon was birthed, we wanted to make sure to stay on task and have more of a “rifle type” approach to ministry rather than a “shotgun style.”  We wanted to focus on five key areas of ministry.  They are WORSHIP, CHILDREN, YOUTH, CONNECTION GROUPS, and MISSIONS.  I would like to let you know how I think we are doing in each of those areas.

WORSHIP – Our Sunday morning worship services have been going very well.  With everything that happened in May, things could have gone very poorly, but by the grace of God and the help of you all, it was quite the opposite.  Our new worship leader, Gerome Fragua, transitioned in seamlessly, and the six weeks of guest speakers went better than I could have ever expected. We have a lot of great ideas for the weeks and months ahead, please don’t miss the upcoming Sundays.

CHILDREN – I could not be happier with what Laura LeFevre and her team of volunteers are doing in the Children’s area.  All the kids I talk to have been loving doing Children’s Church and are excited about being there.  Laura has some great events planned and I would encourage you to get your kids involved. The only issue that we have had in the children’s ministry is so many of our great teachers and volunteers have moved away over the summer.  If you are interested in working with our children in any area, please contact Laura LeFevre to get plugged in.

YOUTH – Our youth group meets every Thursday night at the Napier’s house under the direction of Corey Proctor and Lorraine Pratt.  Things are going very well and our biggest problem is not having enough room for all the kids.  This is a great problem to have if you ask me.

CONNECTION GROUPS – Because we do not have a building or the space to meet for a typical “Sunday School”, our focus has been on getting together in people’s homes for Bible Study and fellowship.  While there are still kinks to work out, the connection groups are progressing nicely and we will be starting a new semester of study on Sunday, September 18^th.  This new semester will have each of our groups going through one of my favorite books of the Bible, the book of James.

MISSIONS – Of all the areas of our focus, I will admit, this is our weakest, but getting stronger this fall.  We are in the process of creating opportunities for you to reach outside of our church walls and show Rio Rancho and the surrounding communities the love of Christ.  Please keep an eye out for opportunities to serve and remember, there is a mission field right outside your front door.  We don’t have to have an organized event for you to do missions work.

All I can say to wrap up this letter is “GOD IS GOOD” and I am excited to be a part of what He is doing at Paragon.  I hope you are too.

Have a great week and we will see you Sunday,

Pastor Matt

(some) Lessons learned

It has been a while since my last post for Paragon.  It seems since March that the posts have been sporadic at best and I hope to change that as we move into the fall.

Today’s post is all about what God has been doing in my life over the past five to six months.   Rick Warren, pastor at Saddleback Church in California and author of Purpose Driven Church and Purpose Driven Life tweeted something the other day that I found to fit very well with my life since February.  He said “God wants to turn your test into a testimony; your mess into a life message.”

As I look back over the last six months, it has been a blur (though, while going through it, it seemed like an eternity).  And after all that I went through (and some things, still going through) I really do think it was a big test that people can eventually benefit from, even myself.

How can anyone benefit from a test/mess like this?  Here are just four of the many things that I learned.

#1 – God is in control and not me.  I am very much a person that likes to be in control.  I like to be the one driving.  I like to be the one leading.  I like to be the quarterback during crunch time.  No matter how much I like it, when it comes right down to it, I am merely a man that God has chosen to use in whatever way He deemed fit.

For example, my biggest fear was Paragon slipping up and faltering because I wasn’t there to have my hands in the mix.  Boy, was I wrong.  The people of Paragon stepped up in every way to do what God had not only called me to do, but also what He had called them to do – reach Rio Rancho for Christ.  The church didn’t miss a beat.  As a matter of fact, two of the Sundays I was out, we saw our largest attendance outside of Easter and our overall averages for the summer were higher than January-March of this year.  All that says to me is that God is in control and I am along for the ride.  The funny thing about this point is, about 3000 years ago, David penned this passage that we now know as Proverbs 3 –

 ⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your heart
   and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
   and he will make your paths straight.

 ⁷ Do not be wise in your own eyes;
   fear the LORD and shun evil. 

(Proverbs 3:5-7 - NIV - Biblegateway.com)

You would think that it shouldn’t/wouldn’t take cancer for me to realize that my “understanding” is pretty worthless in the grand scheme of things.

#2 – God works in mysterious ways.  You have probably heard that before and you may even think it is in the Bible (FYI – it’s not)… but it is true.  I have never fully understood the way that God has brought me to where I am, but there is no doubt in my mind that my past experiences have shaped me to exactly what God wants me to be (at least right now).  Who knew that God could use divorce, death, dysfunction, and now cancer to His glory, but He did.

#3 – Life is short.  I know Reebok used that term back in the 90’s, but I never really thought about it then (probably because I thought I had a good 60+ years still ahead of me).  Now, I think about it a lot.  I am 35 with three kids – one of them in double digits.  I have had cancer twice.  I have seen a lot and experienced a lot – but most of all, I have noticed that the phrase  “it seems like only yesterday” pops into my mind quite often.  Where has the time gone and what did I do with it?

Benjamin Franklin once said “Lost time is never found again.”  Going through all of this… surgery and radiation and healing – I don’t remember much other than being miserable through it.  I know I didn’t accomplish much other than watching Food Network and the Travel Channel.  I also remember just wanting the last day of radiation to come so I could be done.  When all was said and done, I felt as if I had just wasted the last eight weeks of my life.  Nothing to show for it other than a few scars and some different side effects.  How often is that the case in all of our lives.  When New Year’s comes in a few short months, what are we going to look back and say we accomplished in 2011?

Finally - #4 – We are more than conquerors.

I’ll be honest with you… CANCER SUCKS and sometimes other parts of life aren’t that great either but one passage (that I have read probably 100 times before) stood out to me during all of this.

Romans 8:31-37

³¹ What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? ³³ Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. ³⁴ Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. ³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ³⁶ As it is written:

   “For your sake we face death all day long;
   we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”

 ³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸ For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹ neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

(Romans 8:31-37 - NIV - Biblegateway.com)

This life is only temporary… the afterlife is eternal.  If you know Jesus as your personal Savior, that is great news – if you don’t know Jesus – remember, life is short and now would be a good time to meet Him.

A Sense of Entitlement

I love the 4^th of the July.  Outside of the two big Christian holidays it is probably my favorite holiday.  Its probably because (1) I love being an American and (2) I love watching things blow up (and a distant third - it also happens to fall during BBQ season).

The country is 235 years old.  I wonder what our “forefathers” might think if they saw how much this country has changed since they signed the Declaration of Independence?  It amazes me how much things have changed even since I was a kid (and that wasn’t that long ago).  I think of the ups and downs our country has gone through and where we currently are today.

How did we get here?  While there are many “experts” that will give you 1000 reasons, one that really stands out to me is our culture’s thinking that they are naturally entitled to something.  Merriam-Webster defines “entitlement” as belief that one is deserving of or entitled to certain privileges.   We live in an instant gratification society that thinks the world owes them something so they want to get it now.  Teens and young adults see what their parents have (that their parents worked long and hard to earn) and they want the same thing, and they want it now.  Thankfully (sarcasm), we have credit limits that can help us get there.

We think we NEED these things to be successful or to be happy.  We think our kids NEED these things in order to succeed or be happy in life… I mean, honestly, who doesn’t want to give child everything they NEED.

Our problem in our culture is we have severely blurred the lines between WANTS and NEEDS.  What we NEED and what we WANT and even more so what we DESERVE have gotten very confused.  I don’t need to explain it too much more to you because you already know all about this (even if you don’t want to admit it).

What I do want to talk about is how this attitude has spilled over into, and has begun to consume the church.   I love my church.  I love going to church.  I love being a part of a Bible believing church.  I hope you can say the same.  My question I need to ask myself is “WHY?”  Why do I love my church?  Why do I love going?  Is it because of what it does for YOU?  Is it because it meets all of your NEEDS?  Every Sunday, people all over the United States are looking for a new church because their current church isn’t meeting their needs.   I know this because people have used those exact words to tell me why they are checking out Paragon or why they left Paragon.  I have never had the nerve to say it right then and there, but there is a question that always pops in my mind… “SINCE WHEN IS GOING TO CHURCH ABOUT YOU?”

Church isn’t about us.  Our gathering together is a great thing for building up one another, for learning and for a sense of community, but none of those are the #1 reason we go to church (or at least they shouldn’t be).  It is about us coming together to worship the ONE TRUE GOD.  We have been worshipping Him all week long and this is a culmination of that week.  Our songs are to Him (not to us to make us feel better).  Our message is to Him (not to make us feel better).  We are to come here for an audience of ONE.  Everything else that happens there is just a fringe benefit for being there.

That is what “Simple Sunday” at Paragon is all about.  We are going to strip away everything that we think makes church and leave only what really is church… a group of people worshipping the ONE TRUE GOD.

Hope.

Hope.

As of today, I have five treatments left of radiation to take care of the cancer that returned to my tongue.

The crazy thing is, this has been a large part of my 2011 and 2011 is almost half over.

This morning I began to think about this…

Friday, February 11^th was my biopsy for a sore on my tongue (118 days or 3 months 29 days).  That started this journey.

Friday, March 11^th was my surgery to remove the cancer (90 days or 2 months 29 days)

Monday, April 18^th, radiation began.  (52 days – more than 7 weeks) That is a lot of time gone.  I feel like I have accomplished little during this period.  By the time I am done next Wednesday, two months will have elapsed since starting radiation.  Two months of my life and over 50 pounds of my body weight gone… with little to show for it.

In the beginning, I really didn’t think I would make it through all of this.  I have wanted to quit so many times.  When you look at the goal being two months away, you never think it is going to get here.  Now that it is 7 days away, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and a hope that “normal” will return soon after that.  And that is what has brought me through… a hope that normal will come, just a hope that it would all soon be done.

Everyone has help keep my eyes focused on that hope since the beginning.  My wonderful wife, my family, my church, my friends… they all continued to encourage me that the end was in sight and a hope of being me again would soon be here.

And that got me thinking… without that hope, would life really even exist?  We all hope in something don’t we… that keeps our lives going, doesn’t it?  For some, they find hope in our jobs, others, their family, and others still, they find hope in their kids success.  Some find it in the government and some find it in their future success, and some just hope to make it to tomorrow.

It seems everyone hopes in something… it is what gets us through today, tomorrow and the next week – it is the hope that something better is coming.

I will tell you, there are little things that I hope for… my taste buds to come back quickly, the sores in my mouth to heal even quicker, to be able to get back to doing what I love to do without any fatigue and the list goes on.  But what happens when either (A) those things finally happen or even (B) they never do?  That is a question that people face every day.

Here is the answer.  Put your hope in something more than the temporary.  I love what the Psalmist, David has to write in the Book of Psalms, 25.

¹ In you, LORD my God,
   I put my trust.

 ² I trust in you;
   do not let me be put to shame,
   nor let my enemies triumph over me.
³ No one who hopes in you
   will ever be put to shame,
but shame will come on those
   who are treacherous without cause.

 ⁴ Show me your ways, LORD,
   teach me your paths.
⁵ Guide me in your truth and teach me,
   for you are God my Savior,
   and my hope is in you all day long.

From the beginning of this whole thing, I kept saying that I know God has a plan and He knows what He is doing.  There were days that it was easier to say than to actually believe, but deep down, my trust is in Him.

I honestly do not know where I would be without that faith, trust, and hope in Him.  As I look out at those who do not know Him, I wonder, how do they make it through.  Where is their hope?

A HUGE THANK YOU...

Today, I feel better than I have in a few weeks.   I guess the doctors know what they are talking about when they look at all the side effects going on in me and say “you need a break”. 

That happened on Monday.  I went in for treatment #25 and met with my doctor afterwards.  She took one look at my throat and the sores in my mouth and said you need some time off.  The problem is, I didn’t want time off.  I still have 12 treatments to go and every morning I wake up this week, I will still have 12 treatments to go.  I just want to be done.

I want to be done so badly that last Friday morning I wrote a letter to both of my doctors involved and said “I quit”.  I never sent the letter, but it sure did feel good to get it off my chest.  I was miserable and hating life.

That night I loaded up the car and went to a benefit dinner that Paragon Church and First Baptist – Rio Rancho held for my family and me.  I didn’t want to go because I wasn’t feeling well but since both my Father-In-Law (Chester) and Pastor Si were going to speak to challenge me, I thought I should go.   When I arrived, I was blown away by the support of each person there.  There were so many people helping and serving as well as eating, it just said to you – “YOU CAN DO THIS.  We’ve got your back!”  Since the dinner, Christy and I received all of the cards and gifts to encourage us to keep fighting this fight.   I cannot tell you how much that means to our family.  We feel so loved and supported.

On top of that, all of the volunteers have stepped up at Paragon Church to get the jobs done every Sunday.  One of my biggest worries about all of this was “what is going to happen to the church while I am down and out.”  God, like always, has had the whole thing under control.  He is constantly reminding me that “church” is not about me – it’s about Him, and with the true Leader leading, Paragon has not missed a step in the process of reaching Rio Rancho for Christ.

I ask for your continued prayer support for each member of our family.  Only 12 treatments left.  The last treatment day is June 15.  Side Effects last for a few weeks/months after that.

Even with that seeming to be a long way off… I have seen two quotes in the last few days that challenged me to go the next leg…

“Don't let the devil take what you have left just because you can't get over what you've lost.”

“Character is built on daily decisions. Never let character give way to convenience.”

Thank you all.

The week that was...

It’s Monday, and I sit here in my recliner, thinking about the week that was and I must say, I am really glad it is over. You wouldn’t normally say that when that week consists of your anniversary, your wife’s birthday, your son’s birthday, and Mother’s Day, but it’s true.

Let me explain. Last week was miserable for me. As you probably already know, I am in the process of going through radiation treatments to kill off any remaining cancer cells that might be left in my mouth. The treatments themselves are not bad, other than having my face locked to a table, but the side effects are killing me. Dry mouth, mucus, sore throat, mouth sores, fatigue and on top of it all, when I feel like trying to eat, my taste buds are shot. Then, I also had an infection/blocked gland in my cheek making my face swell up and the antibiotics they gave me didn’t treat my stomach well. None of those side effects work well with celebrating anything and I not only felt terrible physically, but also mentally. So much so, I was ready to quit and was building up a case so I could quit without feeling like a quitter. Even as I came home from church yesterday, I just wanted to be done with all of this. I wanted to feel awake, swallow normal and I wanted to eat food that tastes like it smells, instead of tasting like sawdust.

This morning, I went to radiation as I normally do (15 treatments down, 22 more to go). I felt a bit better because I slept a bit better. I met with the radiation oncology doc after and I told her how much I would like to be done. I asked her what would be the ramifications of stopping early. To put her long answer into a short one, she said “you have kids don’t you?” Me. “Yes” Doc. “Do it for them. The odds are much better that the cancer doesn’t return if you finish treatment.”

I then went to another dr. appt with my Ear Nose Throat doc and he told me the same thing. “We need to be aggressive with this because it was aggressive first.”

That wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but it was what I needed to hear. They were just echoing what my amazing wife had been saying all along.

When we got home, I jumped on the computer and I saw a friend from college, who is also a church planter (actually helped me a lot as Paragon Church initially progressed) with a new post about his health. I must say, it put my struggles into perspective. You see, he found out he is dealing with a serious disease that is knocking him out slowly and there are not treatment options at this point in time. I would explain more to you but he does a great job on his blog and he actually knows what he is talking about… so find out more at http://gregrohlinger.com/. Please be praying for him and his family.

I have heard more and more stories like this affecting so many people (and I have seen a lot taking place in ministry) it has helped me see life a little clearer. Yes, I have a disease that sucks. Yes, The treatment is a bit barbaric (if ask me) and even the doc said this is the worst of all cancers to have to radiate due to location. But as far as we know, the treatment will give me much better odds for the future and God has put a group of men and women around me, including my wife, that are and will continue to help me get through this. I am being prayed for, being encouraged, and people are giving of their time in all sorts of ways.

I think that the most important thing I have gained from all of this is… this church isn’t about me. God may have led me to plant it, but it is still His. He is in control of the life of Paragon and He knows exactly what He is doing with mine. I think my two greatest struggles with all of this are how my side effects would affect my family and how all of this would affect the church. Once again, I just need to realize that God knows what He is doing and we all need to trust Him with that control.