A Sense of Entitlement

I love the 4^th of the July.  Outside of the two big Christian holidays it is probably my favorite holiday.  Its probably because (1) I love being an American and (2) I love watching things blow up (and a distant third - it also happens to fall during BBQ season).

The country is 235 years old.  I wonder what our “forefathers” might think if they saw how much this country has changed since they signed the Declaration of Independence?  It amazes me how much things have changed even since I was a kid (and that wasn’t that long ago).  I think of the ups and downs our country has gone through and where we currently are today.

How did we get here?  While there are many “experts” that will give you 1000 reasons, one that really stands out to me is our culture’s thinking that they are naturally entitled to something.  Merriam-Webster defines “entitlement” as belief that one is deserving of or entitled to certain privileges.   We live in an instant gratification society that thinks the world owes them something so they want to get it now.  Teens and young adults see what their parents have (that their parents worked long and hard to earn) and they want the same thing, and they want it now.  Thankfully (sarcasm), we have credit limits that can help us get there.

We think we NEED these things to be successful or to be happy.  We think our kids NEED these things in order to succeed or be happy in life… I mean, honestly, who doesn’t want to give child everything they NEED.

Our problem in our culture is we have severely blurred the lines between WANTS and NEEDS.  What we NEED and what we WANT and even more so what we DESERVE have gotten very confused.  I don’t need to explain it too much more to you because you already know all about this (even if you don’t want to admit it).

What I do want to talk about is how this attitude has spilled over into, and has begun to consume the church.   I love my church.  I love going to church.  I love being a part of a Bible believing church.  I hope you can say the same.  My question I need to ask myself is “WHY?”  Why do I love my church?  Why do I love going?  Is it because of what it does for YOU?  Is it because it meets all of your NEEDS?  Every Sunday, people all over the United States are looking for a new church because their current church isn’t meeting their needs.   I know this because people have used those exact words to tell me why they are checking out Paragon or why they left Paragon.  I have never had the nerve to say it right then and there, but there is a question that always pops in my mind… “SINCE WHEN IS GOING TO CHURCH ABOUT YOU?”

Church isn’t about us.  Our gathering together is a great thing for building up one another, for learning and for a sense of community, but none of those are the #1 reason we go to church (or at least they shouldn’t be).  It is about us coming together to worship the ONE TRUE GOD.  We have been worshipping Him all week long and this is a culmination of that week.  Our songs are to Him (not to us to make us feel better).  Our message is to Him (not to make us feel better).  We are to come here for an audience of ONE.  Everything else that happens there is just a fringe benefit for being there.

That is what “Simple Sunday” at Paragon is all about.  We are going to strip away everything that we think makes church and leave only what really is church… a group of people worshipping the ONE TRUE GOD.

Hope.

Hope.

As of today, I have five treatments left of radiation to take care of the cancer that returned to my tongue.

The crazy thing is, this has been a large part of my 2011 and 2011 is almost half over.

This morning I began to think about this…

Friday, February 11^th was my biopsy for a sore on my tongue (118 days or 3 months 29 days).  That started this journey.

Friday, March 11^th was my surgery to remove the cancer (90 days or 2 months 29 days)

Monday, April 18^th, radiation began.  (52 days – more than 7 weeks) That is a lot of time gone.  I feel like I have accomplished little during this period.  By the time I am done next Wednesday, two months will have elapsed since starting radiation.  Two months of my life and over 50 pounds of my body weight gone… with little to show for it.

In the beginning, I really didn’t think I would make it through all of this.  I have wanted to quit so many times.  When you look at the goal being two months away, you never think it is going to get here.  Now that it is 7 days away, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and a hope that “normal” will return soon after that.  And that is what has brought me through… a hope that normal will come, just a hope that it would all soon be done.

Everyone has help keep my eyes focused on that hope since the beginning.  My wonderful wife, my family, my church, my friends… they all continued to encourage me that the end was in sight and a hope of being me again would soon be here.

And that got me thinking… without that hope, would life really even exist?  We all hope in something don’t we… that keeps our lives going, doesn’t it?  For some, they find hope in our jobs, others, their family, and others still, they find hope in their kids success.  Some find it in the government and some find it in their future success, and some just hope to make it to tomorrow.

It seems everyone hopes in something… it is what gets us through today, tomorrow and the next week – it is the hope that something better is coming.

I will tell you, there are little things that I hope for… my taste buds to come back quickly, the sores in my mouth to heal even quicker, to be able to get back to doing what I love to do without any fatigue and the list goes on.  But what happens when either (A) those things finally happen or even (B) they never do?  That is a question that people face every day.

Here is the answer.  Put your hope in something more than the temporary.  I love what the Psalmist, David has to write in the Book of Psalms, 25.

¹ In you, LORD my God,
   I put my trust.

 ² I trust in you;
   do not let me be put to shame,
   nor let my enemies triumph over me.
³ No one who hopes in you
   will ever be put to shame,
but shame will come on those
   who are treacherous without cause.

 ⁴ Show me your ways, LORD,
   teach me your paths.
⁵ Guide me in your truth and teach me,
   for you are God my Savior,
   and my hope is in you all day long.

From the beginning of this whole thing, I kept saying that I know God has a plan and He knows what He is doing.  There were days that it was easier to say than to actually believe, but deep down, my trust is in Him.

I honestly do not know where I would be without that faith, trust, and hope in Him.  As I look out at those who do not know Him, I wonder, how do they make it through.  Where is their hope?

A HUGE THANK YOU...

Today, I feel better than I have in a few weeks.   I guess the doctors know what they are talking about when they look at all the side effects going on in me and say “you need a break”. 

That happened on Monday.  I went in for treatment #25 and met with my doctor afterwards.  She took one look at my throat and the sores in my mouth and said you need some time off.  The problem is, I didn’t want time off.  I still have 12 treatments to go and every morning I wake up this week, I will still have 12 treatments to go.  I just want to be done.

I want to be done so badly that last Friday morning I wrote a letter to both of my doctors involved and said “I quit”.  I never sent the letter, but it sure did feel good to get it off my chest.  I was miserable and hating life.

That night I loaded up the car and went to a benefit dinner that Paragon Church and First Baptist – Rio Rancho held for my family and me.  I didn’t want to go because I wasn’t feeling well but since both my Father-In-Law (Chester) and Pastor Si were going to speak to challenge me, I thought I should go.   When I arrived, I was blown away by the support of each person there.  There were so many people helping and serving as well as eating, it just said to you – “YOU CAN DO THIS.  We’ve got your back!”  Since the dinner, Christy and I received all of the cards and gifts to encourage us to keep fighting this fight.   I cannot tell you how much that means to our family.  We feel so loved and supported.

On top of that, all of the volunteers have stepped up at Paragon Church to get the jobs done every Sunday.  One of my biggest worries about all of this was “what is going to happen to the church while I am down and out.”  God, like always, has had the whole thing under control.  He is constantly reminding me that “church” is not about me – it’s about Him, and with the true Leader leading, Paragon has not missed a step in the process of reaching Rio Rancho for Christ.

I ask for your continued prayer support for each member of our family.  Only 12 treatments left.  The last treatment day is June 15.  Side Effects last for a few weeks/months after that.

Even with that seeming to be a long way off… I have seen two quotes in the last few days that challenged me to go the next leg…

“Don't let the devil take what you have left just because you can't get over what you've lost.”

“Character is built on daily decisions. Never let character give way to convenience.”

Thank you all.

The week that was...

It’s Monday, and I sit here in my recliner, thinking about the week that was and I must say, I am really glad it is over. You wouldn’t normally say that when that week consists of your anniversary, your wife’s birthday, your son’s birthday, and Mother’s Day, but it’s true.

Let me explain. Last week was miserable for me. As you probably already know, I am in the process of going through radiation treatments to kill off any remaining cancer cells that might be left in my mouth. The treatments themselves are not bad, other than having my face locked to a table, but the side effects are killing me. Dry mouth, mucus, sore throat, mouth sores, fatigue and on top of it all, when I feel like trying to eat, my taste buds are shot. Then, I also had an infection/blocked gland in my cheek making my face swell up and the antibiotics they gave me didn’t treat my stomach well. None of those side effects work well with celebrating anything and I not only felt terrible physically, but also mentally. So much so, I was ready to quit and was building up a case so I could quit without feeling like a quitter. Even as I came home from church yesterday, I just wanted to be done with all of this. I wanted to feel awake, swallow normal and I wanted to eat food that tastes like it smells, instead of tasting like sawdust.

This morning, I went to radiation as I normally do (15 treatments down, 22 more to go). I felt a bit better because I slept a bit better. I met with the radiation oncology doc after and I told her how much I would like to be done. I asked her what would be the ramifications of stopping early. To put her long answer into a short one, she said “you have kids don’t you?” Me. “Yes” Doc. “Do it for them. The odds are much better that the cancer doesn’t return if you finish treatment.”

I then went to another dr. appt with my Ear Nose Throat doc and he told me the same thing. “We need to be aggressive with this because it was aggressive first.”

That wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but it was what I needed to hear. They were just echoing what my amazing wife had been saying all along.

When we got home, I jumped on the computer and I saw a friend from college, who is also a church planter (actually helped me a lot as Paragon Church initially progressed) with a new post about his health. I must say, it put my struggles into perspective. You see, he found out he is dealing with a serious disease that is knocking him out slowly and there are not treatment options at this point in time. I would explain more to you but he does a great job on his blog and he actually knows what he is talking about… so find out more at http://gregrohlinger.com/. Please be praying for him and his family.

I have heard more and more stories like this affecting so many people (and I have seen a lot taking place in ministry) it has helped me see life a little clearer. Yes, I have a disease that sucks. Yes, The treatment is a bit barbaric (if ask me) and even the doc said this is the worst of all cancers to have to radiate due to location. But as far as we know, the treatment will give me much better odds for the future and God has put a group of men and women around me, including my wife, that are and will continue to help me get through this. I am being prayed for, being encouraged, and people are giving of their time in all sorts of ways.

I think that the most important thing I have gained from all of this is… this church isn’t about me. God may have led me to plant it, but it is still His. He is in control of the life of Paragon and He knows exactly what He is doing with mine. I think my two greatest struggles with all of this are how my side effects would affect my family and how all of this would affect the church. Once again, I just need to realize that God knows what He is doing and we all need to trust Him with that control.

Paragon Video Blog - April 27

G.O.S.P.E.L.

IN CHRIST...

We started our study of Ephesians last week... one phrase that is throughout Ephesians (and the rest of the New Testament) is IN CHRIST... but what are the blessings from being IN CHRIST important... and why do they matter.  Take a look...

Because I am IN CHRIST

I am faithful (Ephesians 1:1)

I am God’s child (John 1:12)

I have been justified (Romans 5:1)

I am Christ’s friend (John 15:15)

I belong to God (1 Corinthians 6:20)

I am a member of Christ’s Body (1 Corinthians 12:27)

I am assured all things work together for good (Romans 8:28)

I have been established, anointed and sealed by God (2 Corinthians 1:21-22)

I am confident that God will perfect the work He has begun in me (Philippians 1:6)

I am a citizen of heaven (Philippians 3:20)

I am hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3)

I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7)

I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me (1 John 5:18)

I am blessed in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing (Ephesians 1:3)

I am chosen before the creation of the world (Ephesians 1:4, 11)

I am holy and blameless (Ephesians 1:4)

I am adopted as his child (Ephesians 1:5)

I am given God’s glorious grace lavishly and without restriction (Ephesians 1:5,8)

I am in Him (Ephesians 1:7; 1 Corinthians 1:30)

I have redemption (Ephesians 1:8)

I am forgiven (Ephesians 1:8; Colossians 1:14)

I have purpose (Ephesians 1:9 & 3:11)

I have hope (Ephesians 1:12)

I am included (Ephesians 1:13)

I am sealed with the promised Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:13)

I am a saint (Ephesians 1:18)

I am salt and light of the earth (Matthew 5:13-14)

I have been chosen and God desires me to bear fruit (John 15:1,5)

I am a personal witness of Jesus Christ (Acts 1:8)

I am God’s coworker (2 Corinthians 6:1)

I am a minister of reconciliation (2 Corinthians 5:17-20)

I am alive with Christ (Ephesians 2:5)

I am raised up with Christ (Ephesians 2:6; Colossians 2:12)

I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 2:6)

I have been shown the incomparable riches of God’s grace (Ephesians 2:7)

God has expressed His kindness to me (Ephesians 2:7)

I am God’s workmanship (Ephesians 2:10)

I have been brought near to God through Christ’s blood (Ephesians 2:13)

I have peace (Ephesians 2:14)

I have access to the Father (Ephesians 2:18)

I am a member of God’s household (Ephesians 2:19)

I am secure (Ephesians 2:20)

I am a holy temple (Ephesians 2:21; 1 Corinthians 6:19)

I am a dwelling for the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 2:22)

I share in the promise of Christ Jesus (Ephesians 3:6)

God’s power works through me (Ephesians 3:7)

I can approach God with freedom and confidence (Ephesians 3:12)

I know there is a purpose for my sufferings (Ephesians 3:13)

I can grasp how wide, long, high and deep Christ’s love is (Ephesians 3:18)

I am completed by God (Ephesians 3:19)

I can bring glory to God (Ephesians 3:21)

I have been called (Ephesians 4:1; 2 Timothy 1:9)

I can be humble, gentle, patient and lovingly tolerant of others (Ephesians 4:2)

I can mature spiritually (Ephesians 4:15)

I can be certain of God’s truths and the lifestyle which He has called me to (Ephesians 4:17)

I can have a new attitude and a new lifestyle (Ephesians 4:21-32)

I can be kind and compassionate to others (Ephesians 4:32)

I can forgive others (Ephesians 4:32)

I am a light to others, and can exhibit goodness, righteousness and truth (Ephesians 5:8-9)

I can understand what God’s will is (Ephesians 5:17)

I can give thanks for everything (Ephesians 5:20)

I don’t have to always have my own agenda (Ephesians 5:21)

I can honor God through marriage (Ephesians 5:22-33)

I can parent my children with composure (Ephesians 6:4)

I can be strong (Ephesians 6:10)

I have God’s power (Ephesians 6:10)

I can stand firm in the day of evil (Ephesians 6:13)

I am dead to sin (Romans 1:12)

I am not alone (Hebrews 13:5)

I am growing (Colossians 2:7)

I am His disciple (John 13:15)

I am prayed for by Jesus Christ (John 17:20-23)

I am united with other believers (John 17:20-23)

I am not in want (Philippians 4:19)

I possess the mind of Christ (I Corinthians 2:16)

I am promised eternal life (John 6:47)

I am promised a full life (John 10:10)

I am victorious (I John 5:4)

My heart and mind is protected with God’s peace (Philippians 4:7)

I am chosen and dearly loved (Colossians 3:12)

I am blameless (I Corinthians 1:8)

I am set free (Romans 8:2; John 8:32)

I am crucified with Christ (Galatians 2:20)

I am a light in the world (Matthew 5:14)

I am more than a conqueror (Romans 8:37)

I am the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21)

I am safe (I John 5:18)

I am part of God’s kingdom (Revelation 1:6)

I am healed from sin (I Peter 2:24)

I am no longer condemned (Romans 8:1, 2)

I am not helpless (Philippians 4:13)

I am overcoming (I John 4:4)

I am persevering (Philippians 3:14)

I am protected (John 10:28)

I am born again (I Peter 1:23)

I am a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17)

I am delivered (Colossians 1:13)

I am redeemed from the curse of the Law (Galatians 3:13)

I am qualified to share in His inheritance (Colossians 1:12)

I am victorious (1 Corinthians 15:57)